Poetic Confessions of a Neophyte Qualitative Researcher Undertaking Emotionally Demanding Research in Sport

Undertaking qualitative research can be emotionally demanding, yet the emotional experiences and vulnerabilities of researchers themselves are often overlooked. In this confessional tale, the first author, a neophyte qualitative researcher, reflects on navigating emotionally demanding research in sport, specifically exploring athlete experiences of injury and disordered eating. By using poetry as an arts-based method, this study not only conveys the embodied intensity of these experiences but also builds on existing confessional accounts to provide a pedagogical resource for supporting neophyte researchers in managing vulnerability, ethical responsibility, and reflexivity. This study draws from the first author’s reflexive journal (totalling more than 15,000 words), member reflections with participants (N=8 interviews), and ongoing interpersonal reflection (>30 hours) with her supervisory team, which was analysed using reflexive thematic analysis. The constructed themes were then crafted into poems to create a pedagogical resource to support reflection and training for researchers engaging with emotionally demanding topics. The five poems are entitled: Shadows Linger, A Tinted Lens, Promise of Change, The Uncertain Path, and Beyond Words. Each of the poems illustrate the tensions, ethical considerations, and moral complexities of undertaking emotional demanding research in sport. Reflections are then offered to consider how the poems could serve as a pedagogical resource for those engaged in emotionally demanding research, offering insights into the impact of such work, the ways qualitative researchers can embrace responsibility, and the importance of critically reflecting on language used throughout the research process.